Skip to main content

 JOHN DIES AT THE 


Spoiler alert: He doesn't.


Because he doesn't, I'm ignoring all this film's many virtues. I'm ignoring its anarchic sensibility. I'm ignoring its hyper-aware, self-referential humor. I'm ignoring its deliberately-cheesy effects. I'm ignoring Paul Giamatti, who exec produced and gives a terrific performance, and veteran character actor Clancy Brown, who has a great deal of fun.

I'm ignoring everything that ought to make me ecstatically recommend this movie. If the title is John Dies at the End and John doesn't die at the end, the best you can say of yourself is that you're too clever for your own good. The worst you can say is that your film is a lie and a failure.

John Dies at the End is too clever for its own good. Fail. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

No Return:Stanley Kramer's IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD

 IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD. Spencer Tracy, Ethel Merman, Milton Berle, Mickey Rooney, Sid Caesar. Dir. Stanley Kramer, MGM, 1963 I do not generally write about films I stop watching halfway. What's the point? I either have nothing positive to say about it or was in the wrong mood. In both cases I'm ignorant of its full length to perhaps do it justice. In the case of Stanley Kramer's 1963 comedy smash, however, I feel compelled to make an exception.  My problem with the movie is not my mood, nor disappointment because it's not the movie I once heard. In fact, my biggest problem is that I haven't heard it described in glowing terms, or any, since I was about 9. See, IAMMMMW used to air anually on one or another of the networks, often in December. My parents didn't care for it and never watched it, but my friends watched anytime it aired and talked about it in rapturous terms. Until about 9-10 years old, when it seemed to drop out of conversation, or conv...
Post a Comment
Read more

Fill in the '80s: Peter Bogdonovich's Mask

 Cher, Eric Stoltz, Sam Elliott, Laura Dern. Dir. Peter Bogdonovich, Universal, 1985 As I've noted, my movie addiction starts with my parents taking me to see Disney's Bedknobs&Broomsticks when I was four years old. I spent the '70s seeing any movie I could, mostly Disney and other kid-friendly fare, peppered by notable exceptions like The Sting, Jaws, and The Outlaw Josey Wales. In the '80s, my teenage and young adult years, I began to see more adult-themed movies and started watching with a somewhat more critical eye. I have since compiled a list of every '80s movie I've seen.  It's a long list. All the usual suspects are on it. The classic '80s fare, the Purple Rains and Red Dawns and Top Guns and so forth predominate. Whenever I go out scavenging, I always keep an eye out for '80s titles I have not seen or have but do not own. I regard the unseen ones as pieces of a picture puzzle I've been filling in for 40 years. Last night, I fitted ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Fraternal Twins:Michael Mann's HEAT & THE INSIDER

  HEAT Al Pacino, Robert DeNiro, Val Kilmer, Jon Voigt, Tom Sizemore, Diane Venora. Dir. Michael Mann, Warner Bros., 1995 On twitter I'm one of a few dozen people tweeting their four favorite movies for a given year, one year per each successive day. We started, as far as I know, at 1959. Today we're tweeting for 2014. (Mine:BOYHOOD, LEGO MOVIE, FURY, INTERSTELLAR.) No one says much, but years perceived as especially good get shoutouts, which means 1999 got its share of love. IN '99, as I recall, THE INSIDER made all the critical lists, did the awards-season tour, & movie fans, those I talked to, waxed rhapsodic. I also recall establishment critics of the time loving THE INSIDER & being divided on HEAT. In the '99 lists I saw, THE INSIDER is no longer part of the 1999 discourse. HEAT never goes out of style on twitter. Everyday I see tweets of action stills, onesheets, whatever, leading me to tweet the movies I wish film twitter would STOP talking about ten d...
Post a Comment
Read more